You Had To Go Too Soon
"During the day I have to be strong
I try so hard to show that nothing is wrong.
But at night my tears will flow,
it was just so sudden you had to go.
People keep asking if I'm ok,
the answer is no but its yes I say.
I'm trying to move on,
but it's just not fair that you are gone.
I do not have any hate in my heart,
but I was not ready for a new start.
It started out a normal day
And with one phone call it all went gray."
---today is your 1 year death anniversary Pa, its also been 1 year since i have been struggling with my inner self... the day you died, a lot of things changed within me, i questioned/doubted my faith even God's existence. There was even a time that i stopped praying or even believe in prayers... i remember my prayer the night before you died, i prayed for your health and then the next day, you were dead, without even any signs of sickness, you just died! It made me scared to pray, to let God knows who/what matters to me because he might take it away (good thing i got over it) I know its very hard to get over that i never was able to say goodbye before you took your last breath, but that is life.. everything is UNCERTAIN... When someone you love dies, you NEVER QUITE GET OVER IT. You just slowly learn how to go on without them. But always keeping them tucked safely in your heart... You are in mine PA!!! i see your smiles everyday through Gilliam. You will always be in my heart! #1yrdeathanniv #losingaparent #gonetosoon #missingyou
"During the day I have to be strong
I try so hard to show that nothing is wrong.
But at night my tears will flow,
it was just so sudden you had to go.
People keep asking if I'm ok,
the answer is no but its yes I say.
I'm trying to move on,
but it's just not fair that you are gone.
I do not have any hate in my heart,
but I was not ready for a new start.
It started out a normal day
And with one phone call it all went gray."
---today is your 1 year death anniversary Pa, its also been 1 year since i have been struggling with my inner self... the day you died, a lot of things changed within me, i questioned/doubted my faith even God's existence. There was even a time that i stopped praying or even believe in prayers... i remember my prayer the night before you died, i prayed for your health and then the next day, you were dead, without even any signs of sickness, you just died! It made me scared to pray, to let God knows who/what matters to me because he might take it away (good thing i got over it) I know its very hard to get over that i never was able to say goodbye before you took your last breath, but that is life.. everything is UNCERTAIN... When someone you love dies, you NEVER QUITE GET OVER IT. You just slowly learn how to go on without them. But always keeping them tucked safely in your heart... You are in mine PA!!! i see your smiles everyday through Gilliam. You will always be in my heart! #1yrdeathanniv #losingaparent #gonetosoon #missingyou